Saturday, October 29, 2005

Things about the movie "Signs" which I watched for the first time today.

1. Morgan (that Culkin kid) is probably a robot. (Quote from Morgan: "He doesn't treat animals". How many 11-year-olds are going to say that rather than "He's not a veterinarian" or "He's a human doctor"?
2. When Mel Gibson wipes up the dog pee, he carries the pee-soaked paper towel around the kitchen way too long. Ugh, just throw it away for heaven's sake. Even though you are holding it out of sight and we are supposed to forget about it in light of the sudden arrival of the Cop, the wad of brawny saturated with urine is still very much in the forefront of my mind.
3. Why were the aliens playing on the swings?
4. What is the deal with Morgan sucking on an inhaler during every moment of contemplative silence? That's Sean Astin's schtick!
5. The military dude in the recruitment office is a FREAK. His unbroken gaze, atomic clock haircut, and broken sentences make him remind me of William Shatner on Phen-fen.
6. M. Night always puts himself in his own movies. This is (a) incredibly narcissistic and (b)probably something I would do if it were me.
7. Of all the places aliens could land inconspicuously, why would they choose A CORNFIELD?!? Also: the aliens choose not to show up on radar, but don't the bright spotlights they installed on the bottom of their ship undo any advantage that this technology would give them.
8. If they want to attract less attention, they could try wearing clothes.
9. I thought the scene where Mel Gibson was freaking out at dinner and eating everyone's food was really good.
10. I also liked when Joaquin Phoenix was sitting on the couch with the two kids a tin foil hat.
11. I wish they had done just a little more with the mind-reading thing.
12. Water just eats their flesh, doesn't it. Should they really be walking around naked on a planet that is 70 percent water, to harvest beings who are 60% water, through air that is saturated with water vapor? Remember, this is Pennsylvania.

1 comment:

Jeremy said...

Things that make this an awsome blog site:
1. Lists, of course.
2. New vocabulary, like 'yawning in technicolor'.
3. Origionality, which most blogs lack (blog is the new dodgeball, after all).
4. Your epiphanies, which can be subcategorized into a) subpiphanies, or ideas that a urine soaked paper towel could have come up with, b) mediocriphanies, which I could've gotten from another blog, and c) Tyrannisaurus Rexophanies, or 'omniphanies', as they're called by the atheist zealots, which are the insites the the Elmer's Glue of the Universe. Well, more of Elmer's paste, really, but an adheisive nonetheless.

Things this site needs:
1. I believe 'digestive rebuttle', 'deswallowing', and 'like trying to suck in space' all qualify as well for 'vomit'.
2. See #1 for more details